Science fiction? Feds discover the 'Grocery List,' post tweets to promote new technology

Now if only they used that technology on the budget?

The Federal Government has discovered the grocery list technology. This unlock apparently occurred recently as the Department of Agriculture sent encouraging, rapid-fire tweets to the public about how to use this remarkable new advancement.

LOS ANGELES, CA (California Network) - The Feds have finally discovered the grocery list technology, tweeting out via ChooseMyPlate.gov, instructions for how ordinary civilians might go about preparing a list for themselves.

This shocking technological advance means it will now be easier for people to know what they need to buy at the store, and to remember they need those items while at the store. The technology also has the power to help people make more informed decisions about what to buy.

Unfortunately, there appears to be no plans to use this technology at the federal level, since the concept of actually budgeting taxpayer dollars and sticking to a balanced budget has not yet been unlocked by our nation's leaders. Apparently the concept of using taxpayer dollars to tweet helpful information to the public requires a level up in our government skills. 

Upon hearing that the U.S. government discovered the shopping list, ISIS capitulated, Russia has backed down from its aggression, China has agreed to economic concessions, and France simply surrendered.

View the groundbreaking tweets below, they could change you life.

Finally, we wish this was satire.

Here are the rest of their tips below.

We wonder how much money was spent on this project.

"Look in your freezer, cabinets, and refrigerator. Make a note of what you currently have on hand. You can save money by using these items in the upcoming week's meals.

"Use a worksheet, such as the Create a Grocery Game Plan Worksheet to plan your meals and figure out what items you need to buy.

"Create a list of recipes to try. Find new ideas for healthy and low-cost meals based on what you have on hand, foods your family enjoys, and foods that are good buys. Search recipes by ingredient using What's Cooking? USDA Mixing Bowl -- an interactive tool to help with healthy meal planning, cooking, and grocery shopping. Be sure to include some family favorites along with the new recipes.

"Think about your schedule. Choose meals you can prepare easily on your busiest days. Save recipes that take longer for days off."

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