5 simple steps on how to create a happy marriage

These steps will help you erase marriage conflict.

According to Dr. David B. Hawkins in his section on Crosswalk.com, couples tend to get upset about almost anything, but fail to resolve such conflicts and place blame, point fingers at each other, and continue to argue perennially. This pattern repeats over and over again, until resentment builds up.

MUNTINLUPA, PHILIPPINES (Catholic Online) - "Folks, we need to continue in our work to develop healthy conflict resolution skills. This issue isn't simply whether you move or not," explained Hawkins for Crosswalk.com "It's about truly listening to each other's points of view and being creative and collaborative in finding solutions."

He listed five simple steps to prevent, if not totally eliminate, frequent marriage conflicts:

1. Couples should sincerely listen to each other. Respect should be present in a relationship; it's the main factor in how couples can truly understand each other, even if they have different sets of beliefs. Both should actively listen to each other so, they can show they truly care for each other.

2. Truly understand each other. When couples agree to understand each other, they tend to appreciate each other's opinions. Couples can also express their concern to each other by being sensitive to each other's feelings.

3. Make your partner feel his/her value by embracing his/her views. When you validate your partner's views, we make them feel how important and valuable they are to us.

4. Collaborate with each other for some healthy resolutions. After couples actively listened to one another, express each other's worth, they can now start collaborating. Both should do some brainstorm solutions and then come up with what they think would be the best resolution that can benefit them both. At this stage, there need to be compromises.

5. Move on together in the same direction. After arriving to an agreed resolution, they then have to carry out the solution they came up with. In this final phase, the couple can gain a boost in confidence and feel they have worked as an effective team.

In the Bible, it is stated in Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12: "Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down,one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered,two can defend themselves. A cord of three is not easily broken."

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