Need help with your marriage? Here are 5 'Commandments' for a healthy marriage

Marriage counslor and senior pastor, Ron Edmondson helps couples maintain a healthy relationship.

At times, marriage can be tough. Compromising with another person every day can get tiring, leaving you exhausted and feeling lost. You are not alone. No marriage is perfect and happy all the time.

LOS ANGELES, CA (Catholic Online) - With the help from BibleStudyTools.com and Ron Edmondson, a senior pastor of Immanuel Baptist Church in Lexington, Kentucky with an advanced degree in counseling, we present "the necessary ingredients for a healthy marriage."

The 5 Commandments of Marriage:

Thou shalt serve one another. Ephesians 5:21 tells us to submit to one another out of reverence to Christ. According to Edmondson, marriage is not 50/50, it is 100/100. Each person must be willing to give their all to the other person.

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"How are you at serving your spouse? Would they say you strive to serve them more everyday? Are you more the giver or the taker in the relationship?," asks Edmondson in his blog for BibleStudyTools.com.

Thou shalt consider the other person's interests ahead of thine own. "It may be allocation of time, in actions or the words used to communicate, but sometimes a spouse can make the other spouse feel they are no longer valuable to them," explained Edmondson. Are you including your spouse in your hobbies or down time? Have you taken the time to see what he/she wants to do today? It is important to try not to get selfish with your individual time; you might end up leaving your spouse in the curtains waiting.

Thou shalt love unconditionally. God commands us to love even our enemies, so loving our partner must extend to a greater level. It is not about, "I'll love you if..." No, it is, "I'll love you even if not."

"Are you loving your spouse even with the flaws that you can see better than anyone else?" stated Edmondson.


Thou shalt put no other earthly relationships before this one. Lasting couples work to let no one get in between the relationship. It is your relationship, not theirs.

"Wow! Isn't this a hard one? Yet I can't tell you how many marriages I have seen ruined because the children came first or the in-laws interfered. I've seen marriages ruined by friends-sometimes co-workers-who had little regard for the integrity of the marriage, and so they built a wedge between the couple," explained Edmondson. "As hard as it is sometimes, great couples work to protect the marriage from every outside interruption."

Thou shalt commit beyond feelings. Feelings are constantly shifting. You may not always feel as in love with your partner as you did a year or two ago. "There will be tough seasons in any marriage," stated Edmondson. "Strong marriages last because they have a commitment beyond their emotional response to each other."

According to Edmondson, great marriages last because the couples continue to pursue each other. They keep the spark alive through effort and diligence.

"When's the last time you pursued your spouse," asks Edmondson.

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Edmondson stresses "these are obviously not the '10 Commandments.' They aren't even necessarily God's commandments." However, with his help, you can take Biblical principles and apply them to greatly benefit your marriage.

"Would you pause and consider - are you breaking any of these commands," Edmondson asks as his final question.

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