Don't forget to include single Catholics

LITTLE ROCK, Ark. - Single Catholic adults are a growing segment of the Catholic population, but they are nearly invisible in our parish congregations. Who are they? They are: single, never married, divorced, single parents and widowed. They range in years of age and variety of careers.

We all come from families, but the Church's emphasis on priestly, religious and marriage vocations may cause the single person to feel lonely and excluded. Although today single-hood is more accepted, our churches have limitedly reached out and supported those who are not married or clergy or religious. Singles are in need of support, recognition and acceptance from their parish. They are in search of friendship, love and kindness. They are seeking a deeper relationship with Jesus Christ and their church. How single-friendly are our family-oriented parishes? A parish may not be single-friendly when it's time to bring up the offertory gifts for Mass. How often are single persons invited to be a part of this ministry? Church can be exciting with the diverse families sitting in the pews. Sitting alone in the parish pew can be a lonely experience. Many singles have been unintentionally left out of family-focused church life. Parishes need to raise their awareness to the needs of this unique component of their population. Singles can bring an infinite number of gifts to the parish family. Typically living busy lives, singles do have the flexibility to be involved in various parish ministries. They desire to share their gifts with the Church. Their experiences of their own family, religious education, youth programs, college and life have given them a key foundation to serve others. But if they come to church, feel unwelcome and leave discontented, a precious gift of a person has just left the building and maybe the parish. Trudelle Thomas, a single adult, writing for Catholic Update says to parishes: "Be energetic in inviting singles into the church ... Watch your language.... Put singles in leadership positions.... Provide opportunities for singles to 'connect' with others in the church." We can support and nurture singles by inviting them to be more intricately part of the liturgy and other activities of parish life. We must remember that singles may feel excluded when we use the word "family" and they themselves do not feel part of a family. We should encourage singles to run for parish council, consider being a catechist in the religious education program and serve in liturgical ministries of the parish. We should help provide opportunities for singles to meet and be with other singles. One might say that it's the single person's responsibility to jump in and make themselves at home in their parish. If you went to someone's home where you didn't know anybody and you didn't know where you fit in at the table, how invited would you feel? We all like the personal invitation to be included. We, as church, need to reach out to singles who have felt isolated and thus may have isolated themselves from their church family. We are a church of hospitality. Remember, the gifts of singles are a treasure not to be lost because of our lack of attention. Let's keep an eye out for singles, extend a welcoming hand, embrace them, and include them in their church home. - - - Elizabeth Reha is director of the Family Life Office for the Diocese of Little Rock.

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Republished with permission by Catholic Online from the Arkansas Catholic (www.arkansas-catholic.org), official publication of the Diocese of Little Rock (Ark.).