Ask Dr. Denton: Pride and Fear: Destructive to Body and Soul

As humans we often find ourselves in a position of frustration, pride, fear - or simply lack of trust - when it comes to our personal health.

PORTSMOUTH, Va. (Catholic online) - I received a beautiful letter the other day from a dear, older woman whose beloved husband needed a pacemaker. However, in holding on to his perception of being "in control" and "manly", he was allowing disordered pride to affect his decision making process. His wife was afraid. After all, she loves him. She called herself a "Weathered Tree" in her letter. What became clear in our dialogue was that the issues which her relationship presented were much bigger. I now share my response with my readers:

Dear Weathered Tree

As humans we often find ourselves in a position of frustration, pride, fear - or simply lack of trust - when it comes to our personal health. We need a pacemaker, but we don't want the surgery. Our blood pressure is high and we won't consider a medical treatment. We're overweight and we just won't listen to that "skinny doctor" and walk once a day.

Coming from a family of farmers and teachers I can appreciate the "I'll handle this myself mentality". Many times this frame of mind is successful in getting us past the flu, the back ache, and that drippy nose. However, consider this. What if your 70 year old oak tree is damaged in a storm. Do you let that limb that is potentially going to split into the heart of the tree hang, or do you trim it up? You know the tree. The one you and your children and now your grandchildren play, rest, and "LIVE" under.

Well what's the point of this article? You are that Oak tree. let me explain. Pride and fear are destructive to the body as they are to the soul. In my practice I have many wonderful senior patients who have made the jump to live longer healthier lives. How they get there is personal, much like our faith. I often emphasize it's not what someone else feels about this or that procedure, it's about your health your beauty.

Whoa, what is this "beauty thing" you're talking about Dr. Denton?

Simply put, life should be lived beautifully for both men and women. That's right guys, beauty is for both sexes - we just hide behind our testosterone as we get older and become fearful of the fast paced world around us. OK, prove it Dr D, you say.

A study was performed looking at the life expectancy of men and women after having facelift surgery. The results showed that those individuals who had facelifts lived 10 years longer. Now that seems like an absolute hoax, based on skewed data by a bunch of plastic surgeons trying to get your money and promote vanity, right? No, the results we're real. However, the REAL question is why.

As always with God's plans the answer is probably simple if we look at it with open eyes, hearts, and minds. The patients all started eating better and exercising regularly. They then felt better about themselves. You know what happened? That "personal responsibility thing" kicked off in these patients and they flourished.

The beauty I am speaking about isn't limited to physical beauty - like your eyes or your nose. The beauty that I am speaking of can include the beauty of seeing our children, grandchildren, and great grandchildren play, learn and grow and being around to be a part of it. We are the "Oak Tree" with some damaged limbs that need trimming. With our weathered stand we represent majestic beauty to them.

We're responsible to be the tree that they can live under and be protected by. Our strength may falter, a branch or two may need to go, but our trunk of wisdom is still important! Our next generation of the faithful can run before us precisely because we still walk behind them, watching, waiting, protecting.... I assure you that they do keep looking back.

So what is your point Dr D?

As a senior, your pride and fear can block the future of your family, your friends, and the youth you are able to inspire. Nutrition and Exercise are such simple things if you realize that you are valuable to society and we need you. By caring for your external beauty (that haircut) and your internal beauty (eating that apple a day) your life becomes striking and inspiring. Your life becomes "Beautiful."

The youth of this nation need you. Walk, Eat well, and please, I now adress the husband of "Weathered tree" - if you need that pacemaker go for it! We want you around. We need your Wisdom also.We need the witness of your love for one another which has endured for all these years and grown more beautiful. Get rid of the pride and fear together and both of you can both become beautiful oak trees of wisdom, security, stability and shelter for the ones you love. Now that is beautiful living!

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Dr Denton D. Weiss, M.D. is board certified in both Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery and Otolaryngology-Head and Neck Surgery. Dr. Weiss' approach to his medical practice flows from his convictions about the meaning of life which are deeply rooted in his Catholic Faith. He and his wife, Michelle strive for an integrated approach to life which recognizes the unity of the body, mind and soul. They call this approach "Bella Vitae"... or "Beautiful Living". He is a contributing writer to Catholic Online.

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