Dear 'Heroes': We're through

Chicago Tribune (MCT) - Can someone please just answer this question for me: Why can't the characters on "Heroes" fight an enemy in the present day?

Let me say that again: Why can't they fight an enemy in the present day?

Once again, "Heroes" is inducing headaches instead of entertaining us. Why does the show have to make things 10 times more complicated than they have to be?

Once again, this show is presenting us with a story line that has characters traveling back and forth in time and trying to prevent all sorts of bad things that will happen in a few years.

Here's a radical idea: What if they just fought bad guys _ or those among the superpower-enhanced who turn evil _ right now? Enough with the time silliness already!

In Monday's episode, we got a glimpse at where various characters are four years in the future. (Sylar as a wafflemaking suburban dad? What?) I guess we're supposed to wonder what happens to make the characters lives turn out so differently.

But why should I bother getting invested in who the characters are, in the present or the future? Whenever it's convenient, the writers will just change whatever they feel like changing. In any case, there isn't much suspense building in any timeline. It's all too much of a muddle.

I don't mind it when a show opens with a wild action scene, then puts the words "Three Days Earlier" on the screen. That gambit can be overused and become a crutch, but most TV shows rely on it only occasionally. "Heroes," on the other hand, expects to use time manipulation to provide dramatic punch _ but at this point, it's having the opposite effect. My brain hurts.

If "Heroes" has anything going for it, it's the show's more compelling characters (and there are few of those left). Why keep putting them _ especially less interesting characters like Peter Petrelli _ in situations that appear designed to induce a migraine?

At this point, I am so confused about what Future Peter did, what Present Peter wants to do, whether anything in Monday's episode really happened or whether various bits were just part of Matt Parkman's "spirit journey" that I just want out.

So, yeah, I'm done with "Heroes." I'm done waiting for the timelines and the stories to become linear and logical.

I'm done waiting for the dumb characters to get smart and for the good characters to get fun showcases. I'm done waiting for the here and now to matter.

If you're still into "Heroes" and can keep track of what is happening to whom and when, that's fantastic for you.

For me, at this point, the bad outweighs the good. I can't spend an hour on a show that gives me five minutes of enjoyment.

Goodbye, Hiro.

Time's up.

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Maureen Ryan: moryan@tribune.com

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